I’m talking about big “buts” in decorating today…three of the biggest hesitations I see when I’m advising clients. And I’m going to help you overcome them.

“BUT” NUMBER ONE: “I HAVE ENOUGH LIGHTING”:

Many clients already have recessed lights, or are going through a renovation and decide they want them installed. I always recommend they still add other sources of lighting. A basic tenet of interior design is that lighting should be layered to serve different purposes: Ambient (general lighting), task (for specific jobs or situations), and accent (to highlight features of the room, like great architecture or artwork). Overhead lighting is not enough. It casts shadows on the face (yuck). Adding a dimmer helps, but recessed lights create no ambiance, warmth or drama.

You need to add floor lamps, table lamps, chandeliers, sconces, picture lights, LED strips in cabinetry…. not all of these at once, but certainly a couple of them.

“BUT” NUMBER TWO: “I WON’T PAY FOR CUSTOM MADE”:

I completely understand, and not everything needs to be custom made. I gladly mix retail and custom items. However, I strongly recommend investing in at least a few specially made items, especially window treatments and pillows. Cheaply made or poorly scaled drapery kills the room. Poly-filled throw pillows are fine for basements, mud rooms, etc. But for your living room, please be more selective. The biggest bang for your buck might end up being a set of pillows in an eye-catching designer fabric.

Moreover, custom made furniture is a dream. Exactly the dimensions you want, the materials you want, and no one else has the same piece. Yes, it is usually more expensive, but a good quality custom sofa, ottoman, dining table or console will make you happy for years. I’ve designed furniture to meet my clients’ very specific needs for storage. It is a lot of fun, actually.

“BUT” NUMBER THREE: “I CAN’T, I HAVE KIDS”:

Most of my clients have young children. After we have considered important safety concerns, the next hurdle is worrying about little dirty hands and feet on the furniture, rugs, and walls. We select upholstery fabrics and rugs that are spot cleanable, and wall coverings or finishes that are wipeable. Nothing is bulletproof, but wow, these are amazing materials.

However, sometimes you just love something and it is not available in a stain-resistant material, or it might scratch, or show fingerprints. I do have some advice. First, try to be OK with that. Life is too short to stress over scratches and dings, and they can usually be repaired or refinished. “Too perfect” also looks like no one uses it, no one enjoys it, and it is just for show. Are you just putting on a show? Do not be overly concerned about imperfections. Rumor has it that the heiress Brooke Astor would take scissors to her new upholstery and lightly fray the arms and seat cushion edges, so the furniture would not look so brand new! Perfection is overrated.

Furthermore, kids can learn to be more careful. I love my kids and have avoided certain materials in order to keep them safe (and my sanity) over the years, but I do not think children should rule every aspect of the house. They will learn how to behave around nice things if you teach them. That doesn’t mean putting porcelain in the playroom, but it does mean that maybe you have a new rule about playing football around the nice new table lamps.

Feel better? Now put your feet up on your new custom cocktail ottoman, turn on a reading lamp, and relax.